Fire up your fiction and don’t give anybody a reason to reject your novel
by Jodie Renner
…fiction editor and author of writing guides
Have your trusted friends or beta readers told you your WIP novel is too long, confusing, or just doesn’t grab them? Here are some typical “big-picture” weaknesses to watch out for in your fiction and correct before sending it to an editor, publishing it, or pitching it to an agent.
These types of glaring gaffes in writing, pacing, plot, or structure will bog down your story and invite bad reviews, which could sink your reputation as a novelist. Fortunately, they can all be remedied at the revision and self-editing stages.
~ Overwriting. Not enough self-editing will give people a reason to reject your novel
Today’s bestselling novels are mostly between 70,000 and 90,000 words long. Unless you’re an absolutely brilliant writer, and experts in the business have told you so, if your manuscript is over 95,000 words long, it definitely needs tightening up.
Cut way back on explanations and descriptions, and trim down long, convoluted sentences to their essence. Make every word count.
~ Meandering writing – the main story question / problem is fuzzy or buried.
What’s the protagonist’s main goal and fear, and his/her main problem? This should be obvious early on and be the overriding driving force behind your whole story. Don’t let it get lost in meandering writing, too much backstory, frequent info dumps, too many characters, too many subplots, and unrelated plot details.
~ One unrelated thing after another happens.
Don’t get caught up in “and then, and then, and then,” with a bunch of sub-stories or episodes that aren’t related to each other and don’t directly tie in with the main plot problem and story question.
Your events and scenes need to be connected by cause and effect. Each scene should impact the following scenes and complicate future events.
~ Way too much going on.
A common problem is too many characters crowding the scenes, and readers getting confused and frustrated trying to remember who’s who. Or maybe you have too many subplots that veer off in different directions and confuse the issue. Or a convoluted story where many issues or subplots don’t tie in with the main character and his or her overarching problem.
~ The main character is flat, unsympathetic, predictable, or wishy-washy.
Readers want a protagonist they can bond with, worry about, and root for – and a character who’s worthy of their worry. Create a lead character who is smart, likeable, and charismatic, but with inner conflict, a few flaws, some baggage, and maybe a past that’s haunting them.
~ A thin plot
This is where the premise / story line is obscure, with all kinds of unrelated happenings and way too much yak-yak dialogue that doesn’t have enough tension, conflict, or purpose.
Also, often the issues and stakes aren’t serious enough. Anything that doesn’t directly relate to your major story problem, develop your characters, or drive the story forward should be cut.
~ A predictable story line
Write in some twists, surprises, reversals. When a character has to make a decision or her actions cause repercussions, brainstorm for all possible consequences and choose one that readers won’t be expecting. Add in reversals here and there that force a change in goals, actions, reactions, or consequences.
Don’t overdo this, though, and be sure your reversal makes sense and is in character, or your readers will feel 
manipulated or cheated.
~ Flat scenes
When scenes are boring, it’s because there’s not enough conflict, tension, suspense, and intrigue. Make sure every page has characters interacting, with action, dialogue, conflict, and tension.
Every scene needs a focal point or a “hot spot” – its own mini-climax. Also, be sure to start scenes late and end early. And don’t tie everything up with a neat little bow at the end of the scene or chapter. End with the protagonist in more trouble (most of the time), or with a cliffhanger.
~ La-la land
Everybody’s getting along so well. What’s wrong with that? It’s great in real life, but in fiction it’s the kiss of death. Why? Because it’s boring. Conflict is what drives fiction forward and keeps readers turning the pages.
~ Overkill: Nonstop action
Unrelenting chases, explosions, and violence, with a constant break-neck pace, can numb readers. Vary your pacing and write in some quieter moments here and there for variety and breathing space between high-action scenes.
~ Plot holes
Watch for those actions, events, character reactions, and other details that just don’t make sense for one reason or another. Look for any inconsistencies, illogical details, or discrepancies. Make sure all your story questions are answered at some point.
These types of gaffes are often difficult for the author to see, so this is where your critique group, beta readers, or editor can be invaluable, especially if you specifically ask
them to be sure to flag anything that doesn’t make sense for any reason.
~ A sagging middle
It’s easy to get bogged down in the middle and turn it into a muddle. If you’re losing interest or inspiration, go back to where the story really grabbed you, and consider what came between that and the scene you’re at now.
Can you oomph up, change, or delete any of the scenes in between?
~ No noticeable character arc
With the exception of action-adventure or military stories, most compelling novels show the main character undergoing change, caused by the adversity they’ve gone through and the resources they had to pull out of themselves to overcome adversity. They’ve developed and matured, and are now more confident and hopefully happier, which is satisfying to readers.
~ An unsatisfying ending
This can be caused by a number of factors, such as:
- – The protagonist succeeds through coincidence, an Act of God, or help from a minor character. He should attain his goal through his own resourcefulness, cleverness, determination, courage, and inner strength.
- – The ending is tragic, and the protagonist is unhappy. Unsatisfying and disappointing. Leave that for literary fiction. Or if you must make her lose or suffer in one way, make her win/gain in another way.
- – The ending is too predictable. Brainstorm for possible ways to add a surprise twist at the end.
- – Logic flaws – the ending doesn’t really make sense given the details supplied earlier.
- – Things wrap up too suddenly. Don’t be in a hurry to finish your story – make sure all the story questions are addressed and all the elements of the ending make sense.
- – Things dribbling on for too long after the resolution. Know when to stop.
For more on how to write a satisfying ending, see Anne’s post on do’s and don’t for writing a final chapter and give people no reason to reject your novel.
The fix:
To remedy these kinds of gaffes, be sure to enlist some savvy beta readers who read popular novels in your genre. Then, after you’ve considered their suggestions and revised accordingly, contact a well-respected freelance editor to go over your manuscript.
For more tips with examples for writing engaging fiction, see Jodie Renner’s Editor’s Guides to Writing Compelling Fiction, Writing a Killer Thriller, Fire up Your Fiction, and Captivate Your Readers (links below).
by Jodie Renner February 9th 2020
What about you, scriveners? Do you think you’ve ever given readers any of these reasons to reject your novel? What makes you give up on a book you’re reading?
Jodie Renner is a freelance fiction editor and the award-winning author of three craft-of-writing guides in her series An Editor’s Guide to Writing Compelling Fiction: FIRE UP YOUR FICTION, CAPTIVATE YOUR READERS, and WRITING A KILLER THRILLER, as well as two clickable time-saving e-resources, QUICK CLICKS: Spelling List and QUICK CLICKS: Word Usage.
She has also organized two anthologies for charity: VOICES FROM THE VALLEYS – Stories and Poems about Life in BC’s Interior, and CHILDHOOD REGAINED – Stories of Hope for Asian Child Workers. Website: www.JodieRenner.com; blog; Facebook. Amazon Author Page.
Thanks for inviting me back to your fabulous blog, Anne. Great to be join you all here again! I hope some of these tips will resonate with fiction writers and aspiring authors.
Jodi—On-target here with a heat-seeking missile aimed at some big no-nos. Authors, listen up. Jodi knows whereof she speaks! 🙂
Thanks, Ruth! 🙂
This whole post is full of good advice. Two principles that especially stood out to me:
1. “Anything that doesn’t directly relate to your major story problem, develop your characters, or drive the story forward should be cut.” This really boils down what a scene, or bit of dialogue, or interaction should do.
2. “Also, be sure to start scenes late and end early.” Succinct, important, and easy to remember.
Thank you, Jodie.
Thanks for your comments, Tricia. Cutting anything that may bore or confuse readers will always make your story stronger.
The ending is tragic and unhappy – I read a book by Skipp and Spector that ended that way. Hated it. (And I liked their other books.)
Never have to worry about too long or too much detail the way I write, but I certainly have to watch the tension.
Thanks for covering so many things, Tricia.
Thanks for commenting, Alex.
What does it for me: the narrator is talking down to me/insulting my intelligence. Read a book that had for a character a vampire in 1970’s NYC. Gave up after 30 pages because I felt I was being treated as stupid; If the story solves itself 30 pages in and spend the remaining 150+ sounding like a treatise on psychological disorders (read a literary mystery that did just that); or write a “psychological mystery” that poorly employs jump cut/flashbacks, which in turns makes you give up trying to follow the 10+ different plots that are polluting the story.
Yes, those would all be turn-offs for me too, G.B.! Thanks for your insights.
Hey Anne & Jodi,
Absolutely. These are the reasons editors exist. And here’s a Big Huzzah for all the editors out in the world helping us authors get the distance we need in order to see our own work. It’s not easy, but it’s absolutely necessary if our work is going to get any traction at all.
Thanks, CS. I can tell you’re going to be (or already are?) a successful author, just by your openness to suggestions for how to make your writing stronger and more effective. As writers, we’re too close to our work to see any weaknesses that readers will pick up–and mention in negative book reviews. Beta readers and editors are indispensable in helping us tighten up, amp up, and generally polish our stories prior to publication. Thanks for your comments.
An entire writing course in one blog, thanks Jodie. I’ll be sharing with some of the writers I mentoir.
Great! Thanks, Valerie! 🙂
what are your thoughts about an author re-editing an already (self) published book to make it stronger? Even though I had editing help early on, I would like to strengthen the writing. This is the first book in a series that has been generally well-received but certainly could be improved.
Yes, I highly encourage that, Sue, especially if it’s the first in a series. Now you have some distance, so errors you didn’t see before should jump out at you. Use a print copy or one on your e-reader, so you’ll feel more like a reader, not the writer. I’d also get some savvy beta readers to read it, and then enlist the help of another editor. Here’s an article that should help you: https://jodierennerediting.blogspot.com/2016/07/15-questions-for-your-beta-readers-and.html
Good luck with this stage of the process!
Great points to ponder when writing a novel, Jodi. Thank you so much. I read through them while having one of the books I wrote firmly in the back of my mind for comparison. Very helpful points!
So glad you found my tips helpful with your current writing, Patricia. Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment! 🙂
Alex, you’ve credited me when it’s all Jodie’s doing!
Jodie, all great suggestions! I keep a running tab of the action sequences as I write so that I can see if there is too much drag or flab between them. Checking to make sure there is white sapce on the page and not solid blocks of description, helps, too. Thanks for the encouragement.
Those are all great strategies, Carmen. Besides watching for solid blocks of description in the narration and making sure description is colored through the viewpoint of the POV character for the scene and appropriate for the moment, fiction writers need to also watch for too much description or explaining in dialogue — unnatural and boring! But I’m sure you’re well aware of that one, too. Good luck with your WIP!
What I love most about this post is the underlying message that getting beta readers to read the *completed* novel is key. That is a super important distinction, especially for writers who are in regularly-meeting critique groups where they have gotten input chapter by chapter. That type of critiquing is extremely valuable and can be super motivational in the sometimes slog of getting a novel done, but a potential downside is that the writer is mostly getting feedback on the trees and not necessarily the forest. Once writers have their novels done, then they can organize those full-story beta readers (a.k.a., angels) who can double check the big arc perspective for all the pitfalls you listed above. I have seen some writers go straight from chapter-by-chapter critiquing straight to submission, which then leaves them vulnerable to putting their story out with totally fixable big-picture issues. Which is a bummer.
Full-story beta reads are gold. Wahoooo, Jodie!!! 🙂
So true, Christine, and thanks for expressing that so well. Another option, if you think it needs it and can afford it, is to hire a developmental editor, then a copy editor.
Excellent article with great strategies, examples and advice. Each point is highly valuable to a writer. The point you made about readers desiring a protagonist they can bond with and worry about resonates with me. I’ve found that to be true as a reader and seek to apply that as a writer. When readers bond with a protagonist, they invest themselves in that character, and want to keep reading to see what happens next.
Absolutely, Lisa. If I don’t bond with the protagonist, I don’t care enough about what happens to him/her, so I’m not motivated to keep reading. Worry about the fate of the protagonist is what keeps readers reading. Give readers a character they’ll worry about!
Give me one novel that doesn’t have any plot holes. Oh wait.
That’s probably one of the reasons bestselling authors have so many beta readers and at least 3-4 editors – most of those plot holes get discovered!
Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom. It’s on my wall.
Thanks, Bruce. I’m glad you found my tips helpful. Keep on writing!
Excellent words of wisdom. Not long ago, I was so excited about a new release, waited for days till release, but once I began reading, I figured out who the killer was by the third chapter. I haven’t read anything by that author since. Sigh.
It’s so disappointing to lose faith in an author like that, isn’t it, Sue? Unless it was a false lead? Did you peek at the end to see if you were right? 😉
No, no. I finished the novel. But once I found out I’d been right all along, I “almost” wrote a scathing review. I didn’t, of course, because it’s not in my DNA to harm another writer. If I don’t enjoy a book, then I simply don’t review.
Good attitude, Sue!