Why procrastination feels so awful…and proven techniques to get you on the path to productivity.
by Ruth Harris
We really, really want to write our book/next chapter/next scene, but we don’t.
Instead, we
- Organize our sock drawer.
- Search for the missing sock. It must be somewhere. The washing machine? The dryer? Under the bed? Under the dog’s bed?
- Call our best friend and whine about why the book is taking forever.
- Make a grocery list. Which is at least useful, but still doesn’t get that scene drafted (or written).
- Scrub the trash can. It’s that dirty? Really? Didn’t you just sanitize it yesterday? And the day before?
- Weed the garden. Even though it’s January and it’s well known that even weeds hate cold weather.
- Run a boring, pointless, time-consuming errand.
Why Do We Do Something (Procrastinate) That We Know Makes Us Feel Awful?
Why, instead of getting on with finishing those last chapters, editing that saggy middle, or polishing those crucial first, “look inside” chapters, do we indulge in irrelevant activities that make us feel awful instead of getting us closer to our goal?
- Are we lazy?
- Stupid?
- Unmotivated?
- Untalented?
- Incapable of managing our time?
- Incompetent?
- Do we suffer from a character flaw?
- Are we the victim of bad juju or some ancient curse?
Or Is It Something Else?
- Are we insecure?
- Anxious?
- Frustrated
- Bored?
- Resentful?
- Filled with self-doubt?
- Suffering from low self-esteem?
A Bad Habit Or A Bad Mood?
According to Dr. Fuschia Sirois, professor of psychology at the University of Sheffield, “People engage in this irrational cycle of chronic procrastination because of an inability to manage negative moods around a task.”
What!?
We procrastinate because we’re in a lousy mood?
The answer is yes according to Dr. Tim Pychyl, professor of psychology and member of the Procrastination Research Group at Carleton University in Ottawa. “Procrastination is an emotion regulation problem, not a time management problem.”
In a 2013 study, Dr. Pychyl and Dr. Sirois found that procrastination can be understood as “the primacy of short-term mood repair … over the longer-term pursuit of intended actions.”
Dr. Sirois goes on to explain that we procrastinate because we’re more intent on managing negative moods like anxiety, frustration, and self-doubt in the present than in focusing on our goal, in our case writing a book.
A Dirty Bathroom Or Something Else?
The prospect of having to clean a dirty bathroom would make anyone go into mañana mode. And who wants to wash and fold an extra load of laundry? Or who but a masochist looks forward to tax season?
But we’re not faced with a dirty bathroom. Or laundry. Or taxes.
We’re faced with writing a book—something we want to do. Something we’re actually pretty good at.
So why, then, do we torture ourselves and put ourselves through the special hell of doing something—anything—except write?
Why are we doing something—procrastinating—when we know it will make us feel awful?
Are we nuts?
Maybe we should be plumbers instead.
Or maybe we should just give up and sling burgers at Mickey D.
I sure hope not.
But what if deeper, murkier feelings are involved?
The Empty Page Or, The Blank Document And Blinking Cursor.
You’ve fired up Word. Or Scrivener. Or Google Docs.
You’re staring at the empty screen.
And then?
Nada.
Suddenly, you’re seized by the urge to get out the Fantastic, put on some household gloves, and scrub the bleep out that bathroom.
Before you start, take a moment to peek in that bathroom mirror, and ask yourself: What am I really feeling? What thoughts are going through my mind? What emotions am I feeling? Rainbows and moonbeams?
Or does your inner script go something like this:
- I’m not smart/talented/good enough to write this.
- Even if I write it, no one will read it.
- I’ll get bombarded with one-star reviews.
- Jeez, writing’s soooo hard, way too hard for me.
- I’m so inadequate.
- What if I write so badly, even my editor gives up and declares my book unfixable?
- Idea stinks.
- Characters and plot stink.
- Book stinks.
- I stink.
A Vicious Cycle And A Double Whammy.
Those self-critical, downbeat thoughts connected to writing will only increase the negative associations the next time you sit down in front of the keyboard. The next day (or week or month) when you return to that blank screen, those negative feelings will still be there—and they will be amplified by increased stress and anxiety, the feelings of low self-esteem and self-blame that follow procrastination.
Psychologists call those thoughts “procrastinatory cognitions” and, in a classic double whammy, they exacerbate our distress and stress. Which, in turn, contributes to further procrastination.
We find ourselves trapped in a vicious cycle in which we hate ourselves and our book languishes, unfinished. Or perhaps even unstarted.
In the immediate present, putting off a task provides relief from painful feelings. “You’ve been rewarded for procrastinating,” Dr. Sirois said. And we know from basic behaviorism that when we’re rewarded for something, we tend to do it again.
We can blame evolution, because we’re hard wired to attend to immediate needs—in this case, relief from our negative emotions—even if we know that procrastinating will only make us feel worse.
Why productivity hacks don’t work.
The real issue is that procrastination is all about avoiding unpleasant emotions—not about to-do lists, will power, self-control, or downloading the latest, greatest time management app.
The way to stop procrastinating is to learn how to manage our emotions with new, more constructive approaches.
To rewire any habit, we have to give our brains what psychiatrist and neuroscientist Dr. Judson Brewer, Director of Research and Innovation at Brown University’s Mindfulness Center, called the “Bigger Better Offer” or “B.B.O.”
We need to find a better reward than the mere avoidance of negative emotions. But how?
Self forgiveness.
One option is to forgive yourself while you procrastinate. In a 2010 study, researchers found that students who were able to forgive themselves for procrastinating when studying for an exam ended up procrastinating less when studying for their next exam.
Self compassion.
In a 2012 study examining the relationship between stress, self-compassion and procrastination, Dr. Sirois found that procrastinators tend to have high stress and low self-compassion, suggesting that self-compassion provides “a buffer against negative reactions.”
Self-compassion allows you to approach your book with a kinder, more understanding attitude. Remind yourself of your four- and five-star reviews, praise from your editor or an author you admire. Imagine your own feeling of satisfaction when you finish that chapter or when that difficult scene turns out so much better than you’d feared.
Analyze yourself (no, it’s not a movie).
When you feel tempted to procrastinate, take a moment to pay attention to your thoughts and feelings. Do you feel your desire to procrastinate in your stomach? Your chest? Does that wish to escape via procrastination intensify or diminish as you stay with your feelings and physically locate them?
What exactly are you telling yourself? Does a loop of self-critical thoughts intensify your wish to procrastinate? Does deliberately shifting your thoughts into kinder, less accusatory directions cause your wish to procrastinate to diminish?
Analyzing your thoughts and feelings will help deprive them of their negative power. You will feel less vulnerable, more in control, and you will reduce the compulsion to flee negative emotions by procrastinating.
Consider the next action.
According to Dr. Pychyl, focusing specifically on the “next action” helps calm our nerves.
“Motivation follows action. Get started, and you’ll find your motivation follows,” Dr. Pychyl advises.
Don’t wait to be in the mood to write. Instead, go to your desk and write something—a word, a phrase, a sentence.
Just do it.
Because:
Every book starts—and ends—with a word. A phrase. A sentence.
Because:
Even if it does stink, what happens between you and your muse stays between you and your muse.
After all, you can edit it/change it/fix it/delete it later.
Because:
As Nora Roberts said: “I can fix a bad page. I can’t fix a blank page.”
Want to know more about procrastination?
The expert advice I’ve quoted and paraphrased in this post comes from a helpful, informative article by poet, author and creative consultant, Charlotte Lieberman, about the psychological roots of procrastination.
by Ruth Harris (@RuthHarrisBooks) April 28, 2019
What about you, scriveners? Do you procrastinate? Has it become a problem for you? Why do you think you procrastinate? Have you found a personal antidote to procrastination?
Why do we read mysteries? This month on her book blog, Anne answers this question and more about the ever-increasing popularity of the mystery novel.
BOOK OF THE WEEK
DECADES (Park Avenue Series, Book #1)
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THREE WOMEN. THREE DECADES.
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“Evokes the feelings of what it was like to grow up female in the innocence of the 40’s, the movie-formed dreams of the 50’s, the disillusion of the 60’s. It’s all here—the songs, the headlines, the national preoccupations, even the underwear.” — New York magazine
OPPORTUNITY ALERTS
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Don’t let those published short stories stop working! Here are 25 Literary Magazines that will take reprints.
7 PUBLISHERS FOR MEMOIRS! You don’t need an agent. From the good folks at Authors Publish
Yes. I should be writing. But notice of this blog post came up. I eagerly went to read your post, Ruth. And now I must start to write. Unless something else comes up.
That all said, found the psychology behind this very interesting. Thank you, Ruth!
Melodie—LOL. And thanks, too! 🙂
Intriguing stuff. Though I sometimes don’t meet my self-imposed deadlines, I don’t think I fall into the classic procrastinator category, so I found this post intriguing in terms of understanding where others (or characters) might be. Thanks once more.
CS—If you’re not in the classic procrastinator category, are you maybe in the rogue procrastinator category? Just asking. 😉
Thanks Ruth! This is such crucial encouragement, designed to help us when we’re alone and feeling aloner. (Yes, that’s a word now, you can use it…)
I know my writing- and my life- took a big step when someone pointed out to me that moods can take you over, like a disease, but they are NOT YOU. I think when you can stand a half-step to one side and say, “that’s not me, that’s me feeling down/worried/angry, and it will pass” you can begin to turn your emotions around.
And as for the writing praxis, I’m a huge believer in the “running start”. When I come back to the WiP and feeling anything close to stuck for how to go on, I find myself instead going back a half-chapter and reading from there. Aloud, usually. Like you never intended to polish anyway? Fixing grammatical errors, maybe adding a new sentence, but working my way back to the blank space with some momentum and also, I realize now from your article, with better feelings about it. The running start helps me change my mood. And I usually plunge right in with those crucial first few sentences that get the engine fully started.
Really valuable insight, most grateful!
Will—So glad the post resonated! Many thanks for the perspective on MOOD…so valuable to understand that mood is transitory and can be turned around. I really appreciate this comment & think it will help lots of us (including me).
Agree with your experience that going back to can propel us to the way forward. Simple but effective. There’s a French saying “Il faut reculer pour mieux sauter.” It means exactly this: that it’s necessary to step backward in order to spring forward.
As Dr. Pychyl, one of the psychologists quoted above, observes, motivation *follows* action. Not the other way around. I have found this to be true. Writing something—almost anything—gets the engine warmed up and going.
Thanks for this look at procrastination, Ruth. Since recently learning that my personality type is INFP, and that procrastination is my way of ‘taking charge’ of my life, and that this isn’t something wrong, but happens to be how I ‘work’…I’ve felt a little better about spending the morning talking myself out of potted flowers at the local mega-mart. I know these flowers are a ruse and if taken home will languish until the next rush of procrastination.
I’ll check out the book recommendation, and am hoping the author is someone who fights their own bouts of procrastination.
Sometimes, I look at what I’ve done during one of these bouts and realize that every oddball effort was actually something I’d been wanting to do for months (or years?), but kept putting off as not necessary or important enough to give time to – especially at the expense of writing or editing. I also often realize that I have a small boost of satisfaction when these little oddball things are accomplished. Some only take 30 minutes (or less) and I wonder why I put them off for so long.
Sometimes, my procrastination is just sitting and staring at the sky or the leaves on the trees or the spaces between those leaves. I experience a deep longing for ‘those times’, way back when, where I felt no guilt over staring and pondering. My muse runs wild and my mind goes in 100 directions, but not frantically — with excitement and freedom to dart around in the joy of just being in that moment.
Sometimes, I simply want to break that feeling of: whyaren’tyouwritingyoushouldbewriting and the task demands that are born and grow when we assign writing as a task. Kind of a stop-and-smell-the-roses thing?
Procrastination is my shield, my way of saying: I’m not ready to write. If I accept my procrastination, it tends to disappear and become a hole for happiness to creep into — so, I don’t fight it — I let go of the seeming obligatory guilt and embrace the supposed ‘rebellion’ against writing… Once I have no reason to be obstinate with myself about writing, I stop evading — because writing is what makes my soul hum.
Always enjoy your posts, Ruth, so thoughtful and thought-filled, eh?
Maria D’Marco
Maria—Many thanks for your thoughtful comment. There’s a significant difference between procrastination (usually negative), and the benign realization that you’re not yet ready to write. Your muse (also call it the subconscious) needs time to conceptualize your new thoughts and ideas—the essence of creativity.
New research by Professor Steven Kachelmeier at University of Texas at Austin, goes into the necessity for an “incubation period.” You’ll find details in my recent post about the the formula for creativity.
https://selfpublishingsites.com/2019/03/new-research-formula-for-creativity/
oooooo! Thanks, Ruth! I promise I will only read it during non-procrastination times!! :O))
Well now that’s different. If I could just learn to defeat the editor in my head telling me I should just give it up entirely because I’ll never write like Virginia Woolf or (insert name of great writer, I can do this all day) so why bother, I might make more progress.
Forgive me if I’m off-planet here, but it sounds like your editor has the upper hand – the task master – the one who lives for perfection, the one who says: you suck and then when you goof off says: seeeeee! I told you! You’ll never be a writer!! (imagine high, creepy wicked witch voice)
So — I’ve reduced my editor-head to sticking with the actual editing I do for others, with a promise that they’ll have the last word on my own writing. This appeasement has finally worked – the e-head just wants to be recognized as part of the excitement. So, I need you, but not right now.
My e-head would sneer a lot, and then it started threatening my creativity, so I gave it a long time out – lots of very direct language and ‘good talking to’ sessions.
You’re a great writer. You’re driven to express yourself. Give your e-head a nice cookie or two, then tip-toe out and greet your muse like the old friend who always says: wow! am I glad to see you!! :o)
Good luck!
Maria
D. D.—Perhaps you could. Is it possible that the critical, inhibiting editor in your head is a consequence of your negative attitude, not the basic cause? A serious question. HTH
A kinder, more understanding attitude – I will do my best! (Because yes, I am a procrastinator.)
Alex—To quote the old lyric: Try a little tenderness. See what happens. Maybe you’ll be pleasantly surprised. 🙂
I try and combat the negative self talk. So I might think “urgh, this is turgid nonsense, no one will ever want to buy it”, and then I’ll say to myself “of course they won’t, it’s a first draft. That’s why you work with an editor – and they can’t edit what you haven’t written”. Or “I have no idea what to write next” becomes “Go back and read the last thing you wrote and take it from there.” It doesn’t always work but it’s better than nothing!
Icy—For sure, something is always better than nothing. As Nora Roberts says, she can fix a bad page, but not an empty page. Not Nora, not your editor, not yourself, not anyone. The only answer is to write. Fix it later. And, lots of times, it’s not (nearly) as awful as you fear. Ask me how I know.
Also, Will Hahn comments above on the value of going back a few pages/chapters. Will get you back in touch with your voice, your characters and your plot. Forward momentum will almost always result!
I liked the word “self-compassion” much more than the trend-setting self-care. To be kind to oneself in the middle of a not writing is hard. Thank you.
Caroline—Thanks for taking the time to comment. I agree. Self compassion is much more specific than self care so we have a better idea of what we’re aiming for and therefore a greater chance at success.
This reminds me very much of what I continue to learn in my mindfulness sessions that I do every morning with the Calm app on my iPhone. Recognizing your emotions and becoming aware of them and treating yourself with compassion as you would a friend telling you about how they feel. Being kind to yourself and not berating yourself and letting go of negative thoughts after acknowledging them. Thank you for this post.
Patricia—Ooooh! Thanks for bringing the calm app to our attention. Sounds like what’s good for our writing is good for us. And vice versa. Win-win!
My mantra was, “I’ll start writing as soon as…” Fill in the gap. These days I tell myself “I’ll only…” which means looking at a file, researching online, cogitating, whatever baby steps move me a fraction closer to writing actual words. Communing with other writers counts. They’re the perfect cheer squad becaise we’ve all been there. I also have a phrase I use in everything, not only writing: “It doesn’t have to be perfect; it just has to be done.” And I love Aussie writer Kate Grenville’s rule. She told me she has a sign over her desk which says, “It can all be fixed tomorrow.”
Valerieparv — Thanks for your sane and sensible perspective. Perfect is NOT our friend. 2nd the love for other writers—and for KG’s rule. Fixing is a big part of the job. We need to think of ourselves as repairmen and women. A noble—and essential— calling for sure!
Valerieparv – I love your mantra! May I “steal” it? It fits perfectly with mine, which is “Do it anyway.” 🙂
Ruth Harris – I’m one of those afflicted by procrastination. Thanks for the resources for solutions. Writers like you helping writers like me is awesome!
Great post. As I was reading, the thought that quickly popped into my head was this could easily be applied in reverse. While the majority of us can and do procrastinate about starting/working/finishing a story, what about those who can’t seem to leave well enough alone and move on to the next step? I know of a writer who I used to follow in the blog world and it seems like for the past several years (or longer) they’ve been editing/re-writing/re-re-writing the same book, with (as it appears to me) no end in sight. To me, it seems like they can’t let the book stay as is and move on to the next step of sending out queries or self-publishing, and simply find ways not to move on.
G.B.—I appreciate your kind words. 🙂 Sounds like you’re referring to The Curse of Perfection. You’re so right. Sadly, the reality for some is getting trapped in a quagmire. Please note Maria’s and valerieparv’s relevant comments upthread.
This sounds like an excellent idea for a deep dive into WHY—AND how to stop and move on. I will look into The Curse of Perfection for a future post. Thank you!
I loved this post. Thank you for sharing it.
lydiaschoch—Thank you for your very kind words. Anne and I use our own struggles and imperfect coping methods in an effort to help others who might be fighting the same battles. So glad to hear the post resonated!
Ruth,
Loved the post. I am all in!
Now if I can just finish Anne’s book ‘The Author Blog,’ get to my daughter’s ‘puppy party’ and create a website, I’ll be fine…
Ken
Ken—Thanks and lol! PS: Take a number. 😉
Thanks, I needed this. Knowing that procrastinating is an emotion could be life-changing for me. I write out my emotions in my blog which gives me peace. Now if I could just write down my fiction words – that would give me happiness and permission to finish my book. {{{sigh}}} writing humor during grieving is tricky. Especially when the book is set in a furniture/chapel/funeral home business. Go figure… Life and death imitating art??? It could be… .
Susie—Thanks for taking the time to comment. So glad to hear the post resonated! Understanding the real roots of procrastination can help us get our of our own way and back into writing.
Might you might be able to see writing humor as a temporary escape which can help you through the grieving process? Just a thought. HTH
hmmm… I’ve never looked at it that way. just a bit of a vacation from the sadness for a little while. i could give myself permission for that, i guess. ugh…thanks for giving me a different perspective, Ruth. I appreciate it.
Susie—hope it works for you even if just a temporary break.
So do I. I miss me.
As the self-proclaimed Queen of Procrastinators (I’d much rather wash windows than tackle the messy scene, or even more, I’d rather manually clear a clogged drain than write my newsletter) I’m heartened to discover it’s my mood that is to blame. Upon reflection, it makes perfect sense. I know that when I’m in a good mood – all is right with my world, no nagging worries about the offspring – I’m eager to sit at my desk and the words fly from my fingertips to land in perfectly formed sentences upon the page. But when the opposite is true, when my head is teeming with worry and doubt and that perennial Imposter Syndrome, then cleaning the fridge is way more fun than writing. I frequently make use of Will’s tactic – the running start – and luckily that’ll get me out of my funk enough to get going at which point I’ll keep going. Until the dust bunnies start calling to me…
Your Majesty—Part of being a writer is learning to resist the siren call of dust bunnies. Clogged drains. And unvacuumed carpets.
Will’s savvy tactic will often drown out that clatter. I resort to it often.
Other than that, we gotta do what we gotta to do. 😉
Well, Ruth, you certainly nailed the foot-draggers. Fortunately, while I’m playing Solataire, I’m perfecting the next scene in my mind.
(Did you buy that?)
Solitaire, dang it. One of these days I’m going to have to activate spell-checker. But first …
gbvoss — Nope.
Wait. What? Solitaire? What a great idea. Never thought of it. Thanks! 😉
I go in cycles – and I know my procrastination is wrapped around my anxiety. This past week I’ve been successful at accomplishing small tasks each day and building a bit of a groove back into my day. Going to use some of your tips to help keep it going! Thanks so much 🙂
Jemi—Most things happen little by little—including getting into a groove. Fact of life. 🙂 Sounds like you’re dealing well with the anxiety connected to your procrastination. Definitely not easy but well worth doing.
Hope some of the tips help keep you on a productive path and thanks for taking the time to comment and share your experience. Anne and I appreciate our smart and savvy readers!
Jeannevincent—Thanks! Anne and I are always so happy to learn our posts resonate. 🙂