The First Chapter is the toughest!
by Ruth Harris
Someone waves a gun in the first sentence.
In the second sentence, Jim (or is it Jill?) is walking his (or is it her?) dog in the rain.
In the third paragraph, the dog gets loose, runs into the middle of a movie set where the handsomest/most beautiful/most famous movie star in the world falls instantly in love with the owner of the toy poodle/doberman pinscher/golden retriever.
In the last paragraph, Jim (or is it Jill?) is tied up in a cellar. She or he is getting fired/laid by his/her billionaire boss. Or s/he is in the kitchen making cupcakes. Or driving a Ferrari on the Grand Corniche while some people (good guys? bad guys?) are going somewhere in a truck/tank/bus/boat/private jet.
So what is this? A mystery? A thriller? A cozy? A romance? Urban fantasy?
Who the hell knows?
Certainly not the reader who by now is gone, girl, gone.
Basically, what we have here is a mess.
Of course I exaggerate but, based on a recent random reading of “Look Inside” samples, I didn’t completely make this up, either.
Your first chapter needs to be seductive, enticing, compelling and coherent. Getting it right is crucial—and it’s not easy.
For some writers, including Anne and me, writing the first chapter is the last thing we do. Or, to be more accurate, rewriting the first chapter for the umpteenth time is the last thing we do because, by then, we actually have an idea of what the d*mn book is about. 🙂
Here are some first chapter problems I found more often than I expected—and some fixes.
Huh? There’s a plot?
Supposedly there are only seven plots but, whether you’re writing romance or horror, scifi or women’s fiction, you need to:
- Follow the demands of genre to satisfy the expectations of your readers.
- Have a plot (even if you’re writing literary fiction.)
You don’t start a sweet romance with a bloody shoot-out on a drug lord’s estate in the remote Zika-infested jungles of South America.
Nor do you begin chick lit with a scene set in a meth lab located on a space ship marooned in a distant galaxy.
Literary fiction should be free of intellectual and linguistic sins like cliché-d ideas, poor grammar, and banal choice of language even as the writer draws the reader in and piques her curiosity about what is going on and what will happen next.
Tips and fixes:
- Here is an extensive list of the major fiction (and non fiction) genres with definitions.
- Writer’s Digest offers a breakdown of genres and categories.
- The 17 most popular genres (and sub-genres) and why they matter.
- A guide to how—and why—to choose a genre.
- Tips from children’s book author Malorie Blackmanon on writing genre fiction for children.
- Flip your characters to create a plot twist.
- As Steve Jobs pointed out, you can only make sense of things when you look back so, to untangle the chaos and confusion, turn to the magic of the reverse outline.
Who dat? MC blues.
Back to Jim and Jill: Who’s he? A scientist, a nurse, a computer geek, an assassin, a monk, an Olympic weight lifter?
And Jill? Who’s she? A janitor, an astronaut, a C-suite exec, a waitress, a poet, an auto mechanic?
Jim and Jill? How are they related? Lovers, enemies, rivals, exes, teammates, classmates, collaborators, strangers on a collision course?
You should almost always introduce your protagonist in the first sentence or at least the first few paragraphs. When you create your MC (or any character), be real and be specific. Give your reader someone to root for, cry over, admire, relate to, be afraid of, be curious about.
Tips and fixes:
- How to write compelling characters with specific ideas to get you started.
- From blind spots to obsessions to psychic wounds, author Justine Musk offers 13 ways to create compelling characters.
- Jean Oram,The Helpful Writer, explains how to write the vulnerable character.
- Brian Klems tells how to add dimension to make an ordinary character stand out.
- K.M. Weiland, the award-winning and internationally published author, shares thoughts about the six different types of brave characters.
Are these people nuts?
Characters, main or minor, robots or zombies, superheroes or quilters, need to be recognizable and relatable.
Characters who don’t make sense (for example, the character who tries to fend off a fire-breathing dragon with a slice of gluten-free bread) will cause readers to bail but that doesn’t mean you can—or should—write boring, plain vanilla characters.
Tips and Fixes:
- Neurotics can be fascinating. (Fear Of Flying)
- Even fiendish serial killers love their pets (Silence Of The Lambs)
- Bad boy friends make good reading. (Bridget Jones)
- Monsters are memorable. (Frankenstein)
- Sadists will grab your reader’s attention. (Nurse Ratchett in One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest)
- Characters with unexpected supernatural powers have a life of their own. (Carrie)
- Loners on a mission draw interest. (Jack Reacher)
- A shark with an appetite terrorizes a resort community. (Jaws)
- A friendly dolphin. (Flipper)
- Canine characters, mostly good but not always, from loyal Lassie to rabid Cujo.
- Extinct animals come back to life via DNA in dinosaur-driven Jurassic Park.
Where the eff are we?
Sunny Provence?
Snowy Siberia?
Flyover country?
Glam, glittering Shanghai or a muddy, miserable migrant camp?
A gated community, an ethnic enclave, a down-at-the-heels trailer park or a Downton Abbey drawing room?
Your setting is crucial and, done well, setting can be almost as important as a riveting MC.
Tips and fixes:
In the openers of Ghostwriters in the Sky and The Chanel Caper, Anne and I took different approaches to the same setting.
Anne went underground: “The subway car was so crowded I couldn’t tell which one of the sweaty men pressing against me was attached to the hand now creeping up my thigh. I should have known better than to wear a dress on a day I had to take the subway, but in the middle of a New York heat wave, I couldn’t face another day in a pants suit.”
Ruth hit the streets: “I stepped out into Second Avenue, I held out my arm for a taxi the way Ralph did but none stopped. Without six foot, two inches of ex-cop standing next to me I apparently no longer existed. Proof positive—as if I needed anything more to undermine my confidence—that I had reached the age at which women became invisible.”
Where are we? Couldn’t be anywhere else except the Big Apple, bay-bee!
- Author Jody Hedlund offers five tips for writing better settings.
- Here’s how to use all 5 senses to create your setting with some easy exercises to help get you started.
- An approach to setting that includes examples from Tim O’Brien, JK Rowling and James Joyce plus a self quiz to help refine your own attempts.
Togas or tiaras? Roman or Regency?
Historical or contemporary?
War or peace?
Peasants or princes?
Clothes, said Mark Twain, make the man. And the woman, as any woman in her right mind knows—whether she’s shopping at Saks or Lululemon, at the mall, the thrift shop or on her tablet. Clothes are also psychology, sociology, history, identity and help create the character and convey the time and setting of your book.
From shoes to swimwear to evening wear, whether you’re writing about Betty Boop or Gordon Gekko, Alexander Hamilton or Bernie Sanders, Hillary Clinton or Khloe Kardashian, about Catherine the Great or the girl next door, their clothes are your secret weapon, a powerful signal and a way to bring your characters into focus for yourself—and for your readers.
Tips and fixes:
- Fashion blogs like Man Repeller are up-to-date on this-minute looks and trends.
- Vogue.com highlights the latest in high fashion.
- Styles of the Victorian era.
- Fashion, à la Jane Austen.
- Period US military uniforms, Old West, Gilded Age and antebellum wardrobes.
- Garance Doré blogs about current trends in beauty, fashion and lifestyle.
Out! D*mn typo!
I wish I didn’t have to include this but I see sooooo many basic editing errors when I cruise the “Look Inside” offerings. Typos, grammar and punctuation matter if you want to attract—and keep—readers. There’s lots of free help all around the web so please tidy up the essentials.
Tips and fixes:
- My editing post tells you what oopsies to look for and what to do about them.
- Kristen Lamb lists 10 editing tools will help you self-edit.
- Here’s Anne’s post with A Checklist For Editing your First Chapter
- And self-editing tips from Catherine Ryan Hyde
- A search for How To Edit A Manuscript will bring up dozens of helpful sites.
Be Like Nora!
Nora Ephron said that the reason the beginnings of her books are better than the endings is that she revises, rewrites, polishes them over and over. And over again. So put in the necessary time and work, and begin your book with a chapter readers will love and you will be proud of. It’s worth it!
by Ruth Harris (@ruthharrisbooks) June 26, 2016
What about you? Do you write your first chapter last? What tips can you give for getting that opener just right? Do you judge a book by its “Look Inside” pages on retail sites?
A Note About the Amazing Disappearing Blog:
This blog has been under attack by hacker bots for the last few days. When the mass attack gets overwhelming, the host shuts down the site. That’s what has happened a number of times this week. Apparently the hackers are breaking into to small business websites all over the world, especially Canada, and holding the sites for ransom (we are hosted in Canada.) The good news is, our security has kept them out so far. The bad news is, we might have to shut down again if the hackers come back. Don’t freak out. I’m doing enough freaking out for everybody :-)…Anne
This week Ruth talks on her blog about her tough but funny heroine of the Chanel Caper and Anne continues her poison series with a post on castor beans and ricin.
Please note: We do not monetize this blog. The only payment we get is when you buy our books. Do take a look at Ruth’s book page.
BOOK OF THE WEEK
The New York Times Bestseller, now only 99c!
DECADES (Park Avenue Series, Book #1)
Available at All the Amazons
THREE WOMEN. THREE DECADES.
“Powerful…A gripping novel.” —Women Today Book Club
“The songs we sang, the clothes we wore, the way we made love. DECADES will have three generations of American women reliving their love lives and recognizing ruefully and with wry affection just what changes have overtaken them. The characterizations are good and the period atmosphere absolutely perfect.” —Publisher’s Weekly
“Three generations of women are succinctly capsuled in this novel by a writer who has all the intellect of Mary McCarthy, all the insight of Joan Didion. A brilliant book!” –Fort Worth Star-Telegram
“Evokes the feelings of what it was like to grow up female in the innocence of the 40’s, the movie-formed dreams of the 50’s, the disillusion of the 60’s. It’s all here—the songs, the headlines, the national preoccupations, even the underwear.” —New York magazine
OPPORTUNITY ALERTS
Webinar for Authors: How to Get More Fans & Sales with Less Social Media from Social Media Marketing guru Christ Syme. $19 for a full 1-hr course. If people cannot make it, all the materials will be available on replay if you register. June 28th at 2 different times.
Reedsy Live Chats FREE! Want to get advice from professionals on cover design, writing, and book marketing? Reedsy will be hosted every two weeks on Wednesday at 3pm EST (New York) — that’s 8pm BST (London), or noon PST (Los Angeles). They will run for 30-40 minutes, depending on the number of questions. They will touch on a variety of subjects, depending on the professional hosting them:
Bartleby Snopes Dialogue-Only Story Contest. $10 FEE for unlimited entries. Write a story under 2000 words, using only dialogue–no tags. No other restrictions. Prize: minimum of $300, more with more entries. All fees go into the prize pot. Deadline September 15th.
Call for anthology submissions! Wising Up Press is accepting submissions of poetry, fiction and creative nonfiction for their “Kindness of Strangers” anthology. Prose: 5,000 words or fewer. Poets may submit up to five poems. They accept simultaneous submissions and previously published work. Deadline Sept. 1st
WASAFIRI NEW WRITER PRIZE £6 ENTRY FEE. 3 Prizes in Poetry, Fiction and Life Writing. Winners will receive £300 each and their entries will be published in the literary journal Wasafiri. Deadline July 15, 2016
FUTURESCAPES WRITING CONTEST NO ENTRY FEE. Sci-Fi authors! FutureScapes is an annual writing competition that asks writers to envision a future world, and tell a story about it. Up to 8,000 words. $2,000 prize for first place, $1,000 prize for second place, and $500 prize to each of the four runners-up. Deadline is July 15, 2016.
Up the Staircase Quarterly is reading submissions for their upcoming 90s issue. Love 1990s music and culture? They’re looking for poetry and artwork involving and inspired by 90s music, TV shows, movies, fashion, games, technology, food & drink, and trends. NO FEE: Deadline July 1st
The Moth International Short Story Prize Judged this year by John Boyne, The Moth awards £3000 and publication to the best piece of fiction under 6000 words, open to anyone. Second and third place prizes include £1000 and enrollment in the Circle of Misse writing retreat. $12 FEE. Deadline: June 30.
It was a dark and stormy night! The Bulwer-Lytton Contest is open until June 30th! This is the famous bad writing contest where you submit the worst opening sentence you can come up with. No fee; no prize but bragging rights. Just fun.
The Masters Review Short Story Award for New Writers will award $2000 for the best piece of fiction by an emerging writer. Up to 6000 words. Second and third place prizes will be $200 and $100. All three stories will earn publication and agency review by Amy Williams of The Williams Agency, Victoria Marini of Gelfman Schneider, and Laura Biagi from Jean V. Naggar Literary Agency, Inc. in New York.$20 FEE. OPEN: May 15 – July 15
MYSTERY AUTHORS! Here’s a list of 15 small presses that specialize in mysteries and do not require an agent for submissions. It’s compiled by “Authors Publish” Newsletter.
ROMANCE AUTHORS! Here’s a list of 31 small presses that specialize in romance and do not require an agent for submissions. Also compiled by the Authors Publish Newsletter.
25 PUBLISHERS YOU CAN SUBMIT TO WITHOUT AN AGENT. These are respected, mostly independent publishing houses–vetted by the great people at Authors Publish. Do check out their newsletter.
Wow, Ruth what a ton of work to nail down all this help. And of course, nothing that goes wrong with a first chapter couldn’t go (almost) as wrong elsewhere. I can’t imagine a worse fate than really, truly sitting down to write a book from complete scratch. Surely we all start with something? A conflict, a cool situation, even just a turn of phrase you want to expound into a theme? Naturally, whatever that is, the reader needs a sight of it in chapter one too. Thanks again.
Hi Will, You’re so right that whatever we start with (usually ends up having something to do with the entire theme) needs to be included. Thanks for a great tip! 🙂
Sorry about the hackers.
Interesting characters. How about a sadistic dolphin on a mission?
Improving the first line and first chapter takes time and practice. I think I finally had a handle on those thing by my third or fourth book.
Hi Alex, Oh, yessss! A sadistic dolphin on a mission. Most excellent! 🙂 And, yes, time and practice are key.
So happy the blog is up! And what a great post. First chapters, yes, deserve to be re and re and rewritten. I love the paragraphs you presented from each of you. Anne is one of my favorite writers and I have read all of her books. I especially remember this opening scene. And, seamlessly throwing fashion in is one of her true talents. Thanks for all the link suggestions. I will come back to this for sure. Good luck with the blog hacking crazies out there!
Hi Christine, Thank you for the flattering words and pleased to hear you enjoyed our paragraphs!
I’m with you & Anne, Ruth – that first chapter gets the most attention, & it gets most of the revision attention once the first draft is done. Thanks for the great tips.
Hi csp! Thanks and hope the tips/links helped. That first chapter can be a bear!
Hi, Ruth, another winner of a post. So much to read and consider. Love all the links. I need to bookmark another great post for future reference. BTW, I truly loved The Chanel Caper. Just read and reviewed it. Also, Anne, Ghostwriters in the Sky was a hoot. You are both the best. Thank you for all the help and support you give us writers. Where would we be without your Sunday blog? Yikes, I shudder to think about that. Paul P.S.
Decades, too. Wonderful progressive drama. Kept me turning pages. 🙂
Hi Paul, Real question is: where would *we* be without our Sunday blog? 😉
Glad to hear Ghostwriters, Chanel & Decades turned the pages for you!
As usual, Ruth, you nailed this sticky topic. I read through it and kept thinking, “Damn, I gotta go in and click all these great links!” For me, first draft is written beginning to end. Then I go back and re-write the flipping first chapter over, and over, and over again. As many times as it takes till I think I’ll go mad. Then I re-write it one more time. I now have the rights back for my first two published books, so guess what I’m itching to do, in addition to several small re-writes throughout? Yep. I’m definitely going to go back and fine-tune those first chapters. By then I’ll have read all your handy-sandy links, so I should be super prepared. Still doesn’t mean they’ll suddenly become best-sellers. It just means that maybe, just maybe, I’ll be content with the finished product. Are writers ever completely happy with the finished product? Perhaps not. There’s always one more little tweak we can do, right? Thanks for all the helpful info, my friend, and the homework.
Anne, good luck with the blog! I guess if it wasn’t so successful, hackers wouldn’t bother with it. Not very helpful, I know. Here’s hoping things settle for you for a while. If not, there’s always chocolate.
Hi Debbie, You’re so right! It ain’t the writing it’s the re-, re-, re-, re-, and re- until we get the d*mn thing (sort of, almost, maybe) right. 😉
“…rewriting the first chapter for the umpteenth time is the last thing we do” — Yes, yes, yes! Along with countless others of your readers, I’m sure, I related to this. Shouldn’t we get Gold Paragraph awards instead of Gold Records? (Or is it Gold Downloads these days?) Then surely it should be Platinum for the first sentence after further nip and tuck on that!
This not only was witty, but could serve as a fine complete course in novel writing.
I’m one of those writers who likes to have her ending scene in mind before she starts a book. While I try to craft a compelling first page when I start on the journey, it invariably can be improved by the time I’ve reached my destination.
Hi mruth, How about the diamond-studded Rolls-Royce award? 😉 Surely the least we deserve!
I’m the opposite of all of this. I generally don’t fiddle much with the first chapter after I initially write it. I might add more description to bring the five senses out, and slip in a sentence to pull together later scenes, but that’s about it. Oh, and fixing typos. Always fixing typos. 🙁
Tip: All five senses every 500 words. This is how you pull your reader down into the story and keep them from leaving. Unfortunately a lot of writing advice says to do minimal description, which means you don’t get the five senses in, or barely at all.
Hi Linda, Thanks for the 5 senses tip! 🙂
Thanks, Ruth. Just went through all the links. You are keeping me busy, but the help is so appreciated. Beth
Thank *you,” Beth! 🙂
Somebody said if it ain’t broke don’t fix it. Hahaha, obviously never wrote anything. Great article thanks for all the resource links.
Hi Vince, LOL! 🙂
Very good advice here to fix common problems. I’ll be putting it on my weekly links round up on Thursday. 🙂 And, based on my experience with how long it takes to actually get gluten-free bread to toast properly, gluten-free bread may be a perfect product to ward off a fire-breathing dragon.
Hi Kerry, Thanks for the link *and* for the new insight into dragon-fighting! lol
Wow – this is just SO true. My first chapters really do change a lot before I submit and I spend a ton of time re-doing. I’m seeing many “re’s” in the comments and that’s what writing is all about – rewriting. Thank you for the links for small publishers. Great information.
Hi Patricia, First chapters have (multiple) lives of their own. It’s just the way things are! 🙂
Ruth–Thanks so much for the shout-out for Ghostwriters in the Sky! I should add that the opening scene in NYC that you quote from didn’t even exist in the first draft.
So some writers may have to write a whole new first chapter the way I did. It took a very good editor to read the book and say, “You start too late in the story.”
I had started when Camilla was already in the middle of her adventure, instead of including the “call to adventure” that classic novel structure calls for. Most newbies start too early in the story, and often have to drop the first couple of chapters, but later on, you may make my mistake and start too late.
Thank goodness for an editor with a lot of experience and good instincts.
Hi Anne, Thanks for the fabulous anecdote about starting a book in the “wrong” place and a perfect example of how a really excellent editor can help transform a book.
You have written a small book here, Ruth. My Stetson’s off to you. My problems with my novel as with my body is a sagging middle! Those pesky middle chapters tend to run down for me if I do not start with a firm idea of what they will be like before I start. Hate that about those hackers!
Hi rxena, Thank you for offering a time- and temper- saving solution to the muddled middle!
Woo hoo! I love that quote by Mark Twain about clothing. I include quite a bit, (but try not to over do it) since many of my readers are vintage fashionistas. I continually got dinged in my critique group, but my readers love the atmosphere the clothing descriptions add to! Thank you for affirming my instincts, Ruth.
Got some new tips, too! Thank you!
Hi swivel, Thanks for two excellent piece of advice: 1) trust your instincts 2) write what your readers love!
My creative nonfiction begins with a guy escaping from his own house. He’s rather nutsoid, and we get to see inside his brain, which isn’t pretty. And the first scene gives the first glimpse of his nutty thoughts, which leave a person wondering “WHAT?!”
Does such a beginning work?
Hi Katharine, Sure it can work. Good luck!
You’ve used two good examples of 1st person POV, but have you got examples of the other POVs? Pr can you provide a link to them? Thanks.